school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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