so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
