They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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