if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
