I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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