I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
