Are we in a gay sports bar?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
