This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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