I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
We don't watch enough power rangers
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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