North Korea, Best Korea!
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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