You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
