Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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