Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
