This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize