She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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