Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
