he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
