So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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