So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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