i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i drank out of a bidet.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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