I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm eating all of the evidence.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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