the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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