Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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