But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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