oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
