you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Randomize
