yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Just took my morning after pill in the library
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
