apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize