I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
