her vagina looked like bernie madoff
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
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