So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
