do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
