Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
