Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
