Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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