Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
