I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
