are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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