that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
