So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
All I want is dick and wine.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
