member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
