Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
