I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize