Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Operation Purity has been aborted
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize