I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize