You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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