If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
