So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
