I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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