never play flip cup with pint glasses
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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